Hot Tub Etiquette

[JackVa1]

I have not seen this question on the board but want to throw it out there.

We will buy one soon and have NO experience. Our kids are raised and we are not really interested in having people over to go in our Hot Tub as a form of entertainment....but since we live on a lake, we get a lot of company (mostly in Summer).

Having a tub all warmed up and ready to go, how do people deal with visitors who might just say they want in? I would be inclined to just let them use it but my wife really doesn't even want our kids and their spouses or girlfriends in!

Any thoughts?

Also, as an aside; do you ask people to shower before entering? Maybe hang up a sign or is that just dumb?

Thanks in advance

Jack

[Roger]

I have not seen this question on the board but want to throw it out there.

We will buy one soon and have NO experience. Our kids are raised and we are not really interested in having people over to go in our Hot Tub as a form of entertainment....but since we live on a lake, we get a lot of company (mostly in Summer).

Having a tub all warmed up and ready to go, how do people deal with visitors who might just say they want in? I would be inclined to just let them use it but my wife really doesn't even want our kids and their spouses or girlfriends in!

Any thoughts?

Also, as an aside; do you ask people to shower before entering? Maybe hang up a sign or is that just dumb?

Thanks in advance

Jack

Tell them no problem but no suits allowed. As far as showering, you will be able to deal with the extra junk in the water with an extra shock.

[Kent Ohio]

I have not seen this question on the board but want to throw it out there.

We will buy one soon and have NO experience. Our kids are raised and we are not really interested in having people over to go in our Hot Tub as a form of entertainment....but since we live on a lake, we get a lot of company (mostly in Summer).

Having a tub all warmed up and ready to go, how do people deal with visitors who might just say they want in? I would be inclined to just let them use it but my wife really doesn't even want our kids and their spouses or girlfriends in!

Any thoughts?

Also, as an aside; do you ask people to shower before entering? Maybe hang up a sign or is that just dumb?

Thanks in advance

Jack

Tell them no problem but no suits allowed. As far as showering, you will be able to deal with the extra junk in the water with an extra shock.

Yup, tell people swim suits optional, but strongly discouraged and you won't get many takers. Thats one way to keep most guests out.

[Whoneedsavacation]

I think you either embrace sharing the tub and plan to shock accordingly, or you decide that it's your darn tub and you don't want to share it and you don't really need to apologize for that. I think it is pretty rude for someone to ask to get in without being invited to do so. That's a violation of etiquette, hot tub or otherwise, IMHO.

[cplarsen]

Why? Most people buy hot tubs to have people in. Wouldn't be offended at all if a guest wanted to check it out. More of a compliment really.

But, if you don't want them in there, just tell them you recently added chlorine and acid.

Then start talking about your mysterious rash…

[halfshell]

Why? Most people buy hot tubs to have people in. Wouldn't be offended at all if a guest wanted to check it out. More of a compliment really.

But, if you don't want them in there, just tell them you recently added chlorine and acid.

Then start talking about your mysterious rash…

I feel the same. If they ask, no offense here either but we did buy our tub to enjoy it with friends and family.

LOL at your "excuse". I'm sure it'll work!

[Whoneedsavacation]

I feel the same. If they ask, no offense here either but we did buy our tub to enjoy it with friends and family.

Sure but that means you probably invite them to use it! Right? Or at least tell them all about it and encourage them to use it. I don't expect guests to assume they can ride my horse... or drive my car... or in general assume what's mine is theirs unless I've said something to that effect. Politely inquiring if they may use the tub sometime is one thing, but the implication from the OP was that these people would likely assume they could use it and whine if they weren't allowed to.

Personally, I've invited folks to bring suits over (not sure I'm up to getting that close to some of my friends and family!) and so far they haven't taken me up on it.

[04darkshadowgt]

Whats the big deal? Its not like others are going to introduce stuff you arent already unless they have some fungus or weird skin thing.

But seriously your wife doesnt want your kids in it? That is pretty messed up.

[JackVa1]

Whats the big deal? Its not like others are going to introduce stuff you arent already unless they have some fungus or weird skin thing.

But seriously your wife doesnt want your kids in it? That is pretty messed up.

My kids and their girlfriends - I have three adult boys. The wife and I work out and we are in need of therapy, not necessarilly a stronger relationship with our friends and "kids".

BTW my son called in sick today with a flu thing and we drove 40 miles to take him home made chicken soup.

Thanks for the comments

[thestallion]

Whats the big deal? Its not like others are going to introduce stuff you arent already unless they have some fungus or weird skin thing.

But seriously your wife doesnt want your kids in it? That is pretty messed up.

My kids and their girlfriends - I have three adult boys. The wife and I work out and we are in need of therapy, not necessarilly a stronger relationship with our friends and "kids".

BTW my son called in sick today with a flu thing and we drove 40 miles to take him home made chicken soup.

Thanks for the comments

Jack,

I think for many people their spa is their own personal retreat and it is meant for themselves and their spouse and they simply are not getting it to be a social center. If you feel this way than enjoy it for yourselves. Nothing wrong with this. I would just not be telling people how wonderful it is if you are not going to be inviting them to join you....

[biggz]

I'll let family take a soak, but no drinking before getting in and I tend to discourage little kids. They pee in tubs with a smile on their little faces.

[wireman]

If it comes up in conversation I'd say I haven't tested the water lately. Can't really use it today. At some point with your kids you might have to explain that this is your private tub and you're not really wanting other people in it.

[B0Darc]

I'll let family take a soak, but no drinking before getting in and I tend to discourage little kids. They pee in tubs with a smile on their little faces.

Jack,

Get a piece of old barnwood and make yourself a sign...

"Welcome to Our S_A

Notice There Is No P

Let's Keep It That Way"

That's way better than the no PG mommies sign.

All jokes aside. It really is a personal thing, because no matter how big it is, your spa still feels like a tub... like you're sharing a bathtub. The Misses may feel uncomfortable, and that's very American. Culturally it's not something we do... funny thing is most other cultures DO! She may remember that sharing a bath was the reason you have one of those children, and it's feels a little weird 20-some years later to share a bath. Culturally speaking we are somewhat spoiled with the luxury of being able to draw a huge hot bath on tap any time we like. She should realize it's very much a modern convenience... very 20th century.

Some of the posts on here suggest that sharing a hottub with your older children creates a relaxed quiet one-on-one atmosphere where communication can exist that is perhaps otherwise blocked by all the distractions of our busy lives. In the tub you are sitting face to face with nothing to do but relax and chat and perhaps toss back a favorite beverage. hehhe She may be more afraid of that! Have her watch the movie _Babel_ and realize how quickly these opportunities can be ripped away. These can be special times... that's your sales pitch to Momz.

If it's the "Icky" factor tell her you put some extra shock in there so all is well. I bet after one good experience she may change her mind. But in closing I have to say that it is a very personal decision, and it's just too weird for you both, then just keep the lid on the spa. And realize that swimsuit optional thing could backfire on ya! Install on outdoor shower, especially for removing lotions etc (sunscreen, suntan) and rinsing off any "bugs" from the lake, or soap from laundered suits (of first timers). And remind the Mrs not to add laundry detergent when washing bathing suits.

In a previous topic I mentioned how first timers seem have exponentially higher amounts of dead skin. After some heavy bathing with first timers it seems like you have not done maintenance for three weeks. I find I have to clean the filters, shock the bejeesus out of the tub and then clean the filters again (24 hours later). Buying a lakehouse is like hanging pork chops around your neck and going to pound looking for a new puppy... add a spa, and you just put a ribeye on your head for a hat... everybody wants to follow you home. Who can resist a hottub? The righteousness of Etiquette may be of little help. Did you fully stock your bar only to tell visitors they can't have anything on the top shelf? It's tough being popular Cheers!

[TinyBubbles]

Jack, I feel you and your wife's pain. Some of us are more squeamish than others when it comes to germs. We've had friends in our spa a couple times and it grosses me out. The tub is incredibly filthy afterwards. Then there is the whole thing of not knowing where your son's girlfriends have been (we all know what I mean). Unfortunately, it is a proven fact that germs and disease can be spread in water, especially hot tubs. We had an outbreak of herpes once at a water park here. I think you will just have to tell your sons that the hot tub is for you and your wife only. With friends, I think you can get by with excuses until they get the hint. Maybe you could just tell everyone that the only way your wife agreed to a spa is if you promised it was only for the two of you. If you do find yourself caving to the pressure, just put a large dose of chlorine in before you let anyone soak. Good luck.

[B0Darc]

Jack, I feel you and your wife's pain. Some of us are more squeamish than others when it comes to germs. We've had friends in our spa a couple times and it grosses me out. The tub is incredibly filthy afterwards. Then there is the whole thing of not knowing where your son's girlfriends have been (we all know what I mean). Unfortunately, it is a proven fact that germs and disease can be spread in water, especially hot tubs. We had an outbreak of herpes once at a water park here. I think you will just have to tell your sons that the hot tub is for you and your wife only. With friends, I think you can get by with excuses until they get the hint. Maybe you could just tell everyone that the only way your wife agreed to a spa is if you promised it was only for the two of you. If you do find yourself caving to the pressure, just put a large dose of chlorine in before you let anyone soak. Good luck.

Herpes and hottubs is a long debated question with no definitive answer. There are other things just as bad that can be infectious in poorly maintained water. I also mentioned you could tell her you shocked the water, but TinyB is right and it might be wise to actually add a little chlorine (1/4 dose and run jets for a full cycle before getting in?) if you're feeling uncomfortable. Don't add your full chlorine routine and climb right in, but a drizzle of bleach (<1 oz?) couldn't hurt.

Plenty of folks believe it's possible to get HIV from mosquitoes or herpes from hot tubs, and while many experts agree it might be possible under ideal circumstances, the facts are there are no confirmed cases of this happening. I'm sure there are many folks who got herpes in a hot tub, but they were NOT just soaking... still it's a very personal decision and many people are uncomfortable just having their feet bump together.

Hey it's your damn hot tub! Just tell them how much it has sparked you are your significant others relationship and it may be THEM that does not want to get in It's hard asking casual acquaintances if they have any open sores etc, before they enter your spa. Let's hope you have a better class of family friends neighbors than that! I cannot recommend you make a sign that states "no one with open sores should enter spa..." that would hang directly over the UNWELCOME mat

[TinyBubbles]

Bo, I'd have to disagree if you are saying there are no confirmed cases of herpes being spread through pools or hot tubs. My brother-in-law is a dr. and worked with the cdc when they had the herpes outbreak at the water park. Sends shivers up my spine. It was a huge issue because, as you can imagine, kids swallow alot of water at waterparks and some had them internally. The people that contracted the disease at the waterpark weren't doing anything out of the ordinary. You made me chuckle outloud at the prospect of asking friends if they have any open wounds. You may have hit on something though, if I saw a sign like that, it would make me think twice about wanting to soak in someone's spa. I used to get in hot tubs on cruises and ski vacations, now that I own one, there is no way I would step foot in one other than my own.

Tiny, the germaphobe, bubbles.

[cplarsen]

Er, if he's worried about his son's girlfriends having herpes, I don't think her getting in his spa is his biggest problem…

[JackVa1]

Thanks for all the great responses.

I am not as concerned about all of this as is my wife. Of course we have many great times witj your sons and this continues as they move on. We don't need to treasure moments in a hot tub to keep our strong family ties.

Mostly it's the visitors because we live at a lake and have lots of friends from our old area visiting; reletives too.

I got great ideas from your comments so thanks a lot. Our bar is open but our hot tub is just for us so far (we still have to select one and bring it home). Thanks again.

Jack

[David66]

This whole thread has been really interesting. We've only had our tub for a few months now, but I've been telling people "hey, come on over sometime and try out our new hot tub." Some of them have taken me up on my invitation. They include my business partner and friend of over 20 years, and then the rest have been relatives: my wife's brothers/sisters (and their spouse), and my relatives, a total of 11 different adults, in their 40's, 50's (one niece, Soph in college). All of those people were in it once...one couple has been in it twice. I let them bring their own suits and didn't make a fuss about introducing detergent into the water. I would trust that none of them had any health issue to worry about, and I didn't really notice any "extreme dirtiness" to the water after they soaked. My son has had 3 or 4 of his friends (he's 15) over once, and my daughter had two friends over once (she's 13). So as you can see, to have that number of different people in about 3 or 4 months of use means that it hasn't really gotten a lot of use by different people than me, my wife and my kids. I suppose if we had visitors more frequently the filters and such would need a bit more maintenance and cleaning.

But, this thread has changed my mind about inviting people over. We don't have a ton of friends popping over for a visit, nor do we get asked by people to use our hot tub. If we know them well and they ask, we probably will let them, and I'll probably invite all the close relatives at some point, but I don't think all of them will take me up on it. However, I don't think I'll let just anybody in the tub, and I always make sure to dose it pretty high afterwards, and I also add some beforehand if I know it's going to happen.

So, thanks for the discussion everyone. I now have some things to say when I do identify a person or two I don't want in my tub

Finally, I heard a story from a relative about someone he knew who owned a hot tub. This guy came home to find his 20 something daughter in the hot tub with her boyfriend. He blew a gasket, kicked them out (and not for anything that was going on in the tub , yelling and screaming the whole time of "how dare you use my tub...I don't know where you've been". The next day he drained his tub and changed the water.

I don't think I'll go to that extreme. My sanitation practices should ward off just about everything that's out there. But, I don't think I'll be as freely extending invitations, either. It IS sort of a personal thing, and there ARE some health and sanitation issues.

David 66

[wireman]

Some you better not use a public restroom or one in a hotel for that matter. Wouldn't want to use a shopping cart either.. Geeshh. A properly sanitized tub is as safe as anything.. Doesn't mean you want to share it with your friends but the idea you'll catch something in chlorinated water is absurd.

[TinyBubbles]

Some you better not use a public restroom or one in a hotel for that matter. Wouldn't want to use a shopping cart either.. Geeshh. A properly sanitized tub is as safe as anything.. Doesn't mean you want to share it with your friends but the idea you'll catch something in chlorinated water is absurd.

http://cbs2.com/goldstein/Hot.Tub.Bacteria.2.531490.html

Properly sanitized is the key. Based on the questions asked on this forum and others, many people do not have a handle on proper water care. It can be confusing and water can easily get away from us. There were always be people that throw caution to the wind and there will always be those of us that don't use public restrooms, sanitize our bathrooms in hotels and wipe down our shopping cart handles. Neither way is right or wrong. We are just responding to try and help Jack with his particular situation.

[B0Darc]

Some you better not use a public restroom or one in a hotel for that matter. Wouldn't want to use a shopping cart either.. Geeshh. A properly sanitized tub is as safe as anything.. Doesn't mean you want to share it with your friends but the idea you'll catch something in chlorinated water is absurd.

hehhehe You *do* know there are people who won't use a public restroom and are super-choosy about which hotel they stay at (read:sweep sheets with black light wand)... not me tho, I'm trying to build up my immunity for the next pandemic. These folks are a great sales demographic tho, items like hand sanitizer and kitchen counter spray chlorine stuff safe enough to spray on everything. But I have to agree, in a carefully maintained spa you should feel pretty safe, and comparing soaking in spa water to a day at the water park is comparing apples to doughnuts... even though it does point out that some bad things can be transmitted via water, so some due diligence is in order.

The spa zone disclaimer sign thing is my next get-rich-quick scheme. I've been obsessed. I mean you should be able to ask folks with an open herpes canker to not get in your spa, but any proper sign for that needs to have some finesse and gentility. You can all order my new spa sign from

www.youreallyshouldgetabetterqualitygroupoffriends.com <j/k!>

The trick of making the sign more friendly was replace all of the offensive things with fluffy happy icons and then just make a legend down at the bottom for cross-referencing.

For example;

#1 Herpes Type I or II open canker sore = Smilie face!

#2 HIV positive = pink flower

#3 Hepatitus C = white bunny

#4 Tuberculosis = silly monkey

#5 Really bad case of athletes foot = frog

#6 Complete Medical History = Dr. head with stethoscope

#7 S.T.D. not listed above = *wink*

Since the spa is such a family oriented area where friends and neighbors gather it needs to communicate the important themes of our paranoia with a certain gentle persuasion yet feel welcoming... it goes a little like this.

Greetings! Welcome to our spa.

In consideration for fellow bathers and to meet Health Dept. regulations

please present your Host(ess) with your current [#6 Dr. Head]

Please DO NOT enter the hottub if...

You are currently suffering from a

have tested [pink flower]

or suffer from [white bunny] or

If you have [silly Monkey] just leave now!

We want everyone to enjoy their visit,

so thanks in advance for "just saying No Thank you"

...even if you only have a [frog]

Bo "have your people call my people" Darc

[wireman]

LMAO! Thats some funny stuff!

[SmilinBare]

You are invited to use our tub if you (1) are willing to take a shower and scrub a dub dub and (2) aren't uptight about being naked with your naked friends. No exceptions. We religiously shower and thoroughly rinse before every soak. It was a bit of a PITA, at first, but now it's part of our routine.