Thanks to all for your responses.
As far as the pump goes, hubby made those choices. He has his reasons, I guess---he was in the plumbing/heating business for many years and pored over the specs for about half a million pumps and filters before picking the Pentair pump. I can see the point in going with one brand, though, now that a few of you have pointed out the benefits.
I think we will skip the light. It will add over $900 to the cost and for that money I can throw a flashlight and a few rocks in a ziploc and toss it in the pool, LOL. Just kidding but yes, we do have a shed nearby (actually, the house will be only eight feet away from the pool) and we already have floodlights on the house. I've seen some beautiful lighting treatments in pool magazines and online but in all honesty I think we've topped out the budget and we still have to allow for unforeseen expenses if they come along.
Groo---a concrete pool here would add at least 20% more to the price. I have friends who have concrete pools and friends who have vinyl pools and while both have their advantages it seems that the vinyl pools are easier and less expensive to maintain. I might be kidding myself but I'm hoping for the best. Vinyl liners (30g) last about 10 years here too.
Our yard is small and fully fenced. I still want a bit of lawn and landscaping around the pool---we actually increased the amount of cement work that we are doing and we also have a fairly large lanai that is off the back of the house (it's really an outdoor living room) so I think we'll have plenty of entertaining space. We just wanted enought patio at one end of the pool to put a small table and a few chairs. We also have some palms and brick planters around the perimeter of the yard, right up to the fence.
Access is tight---we cut down a fan palm and moved a shed and have to remove a portion of our fence to get the equipment in. Should be fun!
We signed the contract, BTW. Now I am having dreams about giant boulders and tons of adobe clay (extra cost for excavation if they find those things, of course).
Thanks again for all your opinions!